If you’ve tried everything from increasing sexual arousal to using lube and still experience pain during sex, it might be time to see a doctor. Painful sex can be a sign of a serious condition, like endometriosis, which occurs when tissue that normally lines your uterus grows outside of it.
1. You’re not lubricated properly
As much as sex is fun and exciting, it’s not always pleasant. Pain during sex can be frustrating, and it’s important to figure out the cause of your pain so you can treat it and feel better. The good news is that a lot of the time, the causes of painful sex are simple and easy to treat.
One of the most common reasons why sex hurts is because you’re not lubricated properly. If you’re not using enough lubricant, it can cause friction and irritation, which will lead to pain. Make sure you use a water-based lubricant to avoid this problem. If you’re using a vaginal toy, make sure it is properly lubricated as well.
Another reason why sex may hurt is because you’re nervous or uncomfortable. If you’re worried about your partner’s performance or are anxious about your body image, it can be difficult to relax and get aroused. Try to talk about these things with your partner and work on relaxing before sex.
Finally, pain during sex can also be caused by an infection or inflammation in your vulva. If you’re experiencing pain during sex, it’s important to talk to your OBGYN about this. Infections and inflammation in the vulva can include things like chlamydia, gonorrhea, or yeast infections. These conditions can all lead to pain during sex, and they should be treated immediately.
2. You’re not in the right position
If you’re experiencing pain during sex, it may be because you’re not in the right position. Whether you’re having oral, anal, or vaginal sex, it’s important that you find the most comfortable position possible. If you’re not able to have painless penetration, try using extra lube and experiment with different positions that are more comfortable.
You could also be experiencing pain because you’re clenching your pelvic muscles without realizing it, which can cause anal and vaginal pain during sex. If you feel like you’re clenching your pelvic muscle during sexual activity, try relaxing and taking a warm bath or getting a massage to help ease the tension.
A lot of pain during sex can be caused by the stretching of the hymen, which happens when you have penetrative sex. This can be caused by a lack of lube, a bad angle during penetration, or an unnatural sexual position.
If you’re having pain during sex, it’s important to communicate with your partner about what’s going on. You don’t want them to think that you’re not enjoying sex, and they shouldn’t have to pretend to enjoy it for your benefit. If you notice your partner is acting less interested in sex, consider talking with a therapist to help work through any issues that might be preventing intimacy. This can be especially helpful if you’re experiencing pain regularly and can’t figure out why.
3. You’re experiencing an infection
If you’re experiencing pain that lasts a few days after sex, it could be a sign of an infection. This includes a yeast infection or a UTI (urinary tract infection), as well as STIs like chlamydia and gonorrhea, which cause vaginal inflammation that can hurt during penetrative sex. Yeast infections can be relieved with antifungal medications, and STIs can be treated with antibiotics.
If the pain is constant or getting worse, it’s time to see your OB/GYN. They can test for infections, as well as other conditions that may be causing your pain, such as vulvodynia or vaginismus. Vulvodynia is chronic pain around the vaginal opening, which can include burning, tinging, itching, rawness, and pain during penetration. It can be caused by pregnancy, surgery, pelvic trauma, a misaligned hymen, or piercings that aren’t healed properly. Vaginismus is when your muscles contract and squinch up the vaginal opening, which can also cause pain during sex.
Even though it’s common for women to feel pain during sex, it shouldn’t be tolerated or accepted as normal. If you’re feeling sore after sex, it’s important to discuss your concerns with your partner and see your doctor. They’ll help you figure out what the issue is and how to fix it. Sex should be enjoyable, and if it’s not, there are steps you can take to make it better.
4. You’re experiencing an allergy
If your sex still hurts after you’ve tried using more lube, changing your position, and addressing any other physical causes of pain, then it may be time to talk to your doctor. Painful sex, called dyspareunia, can have many causes, from gynecologic conditions like endometriosis to birth defects, including Mayer-Rokitansky-Kuster-Hauser syndrome that causes incomplete development of the reproductive organs. Your doctor will want to know about your sexual history and any other symptoms you’re experiencing to find the source of the pain and help you overcome it.
For many women, painful sex occurs during or after penetration. This can be due to a variety of reasons, including the first time you experience intercourse, or for those with painful sex that is chronic, your partner may be experiencing vulvodynia. Vulvodynia is caused by nerves in the vagina that are triggered by pressure or friction. It can lead to a dull or sharp pain that can occur after penetrative sex, while inserting a tampon, or even just sex in general.
While painful sex is very common, it shouldn’t be a regular occurrence in your life. If you’re constantly experiencing pain during sex, it might be worth talking to your doctor or a sex therapist to see what is causing the pain so you can find the right treatment and get back to enjoying sensual intimacy with your partner!
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